I have two girlfriends who both lost their sons this week, within one day of each other.
They were adult children, but children nonetheless.
How do you help a close friend, or relative, deal with the death of a loved one?
Here's a list of tips:
Cook a meal, freeze it, and take it over. Why freeze it? Because it takes the pressure off. They can eat it at their own convenience, when their appetite returns.
Offer to drive or run errands. Even the simplest chores seem impossible to someone who's grieving.
Offer to help them organize/box/clean out, ect.
If you can afford it, give them a little money in a card. People tend to miss work in this situation, so helping out monetarily is usually welcome.
Don't tell them that you know how they feel, just listen.
Visit and offer to do housework while they take a nap/read/shower.
Don't forget to call them two weeks later to see if they need anything. Then call again two weeks after that. Your constant support will be appreciated.
Most of all, just let your friend know that you are there for them, anytime.